Blue Balls

Ahhh....thought that would get your attention. Okay, now you can get your mind out of the gutter; it's not what you think! You may remember in an earlier post I mentioned that I employ M&M bribery when needed. Well aside from luring my child out from under our bed, or up from the pile of mulch she so dramatically threw herself onto at the playground (usually stemming from the sequential use of the words "we," "have," "to," and "go"), it's most often needed to coerce my daughter into using her potty (oh...instead of, let's say, um....our 80% poly-down blend couch.) She is well aware by now that she is rewarded with 1 M&M for "trying" and 2 M&M's for actually "doing something." (I'm considering revoking the whole "1 M&M for trying" clause of our "contract" for habitual abuse, however.) Consequently, three problems have arisen with this potty training method. The first being that our daughter seems to be on a 24-hour sugar-rush (not such a big deal when faced with the next two.) The second (and a little more disturbing) problem is that I fear we are inadvertantly conditioning our child to urinate at the sight of small, rainbow-colored candies (you remember Pavlov's dog, don't you?) But the final, most distressing of all, is that she refers to M&M's as "balls." Not so bad, if her favorite color wasn't blue. However, when your daughter comes running from the bathroom elatedly screaming, "TWO BLUE BALLS, MOMMA, ONE....TWO," you cannot help but feel alarmed.